Просто последовательность воспоминаний. Будет ли легче? Нет. Сложности бодрят. "Когда это кончится?". Никогда. Стремление, натуга, труд. Почему-то есть жизнь, а не пустота. Разве это не поразительно? Всё успокаивается и утихомиривается, когда всего лишь об этом думаешь.
Who’s who
W. H. Auden
A shilling life¹ will give you all the facts:
How Father beat him, how he ran away,
What were the struggles of his youth, what acts
Made him the greatest figure of his day:
Of how he fought, fished, hunted, worked all night,
Though giddy, climbed new mountains; named a sea:
Some of the last researches even write
Love made him weep his pints like you and me.
With all his honors on, he sighed for one
Who, say astonished critics, lived at home;
Did little jobs about the house with skill
And nothing else; could whistle, would sit still
Or potter round the garden; answered some
Of his long marvelous letters but kept none.
¹shilling life – a short biographical sketch in the tabloid or penny press