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Автор
Статистика
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Самые смешные анекдоты на английском языке
Самые смешные анекдоты на английском языке |
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One day, a man on a golf course, was having a really lousy game. Just as he was about to hit the ball, he heard a voice behind him.
- Rabbit 9 iron, rabbit 9 iron. He turned around and there was a frog on the green. - OK, frog, we'll just see how much you know, - said the man. He used the 9 iron and hit a hole in one. The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. - What do you think, frog? - Rabbit 3 wood, rabbit 3 wood. After golfing, the most amazing game of his life, the man takes the frog to the casino. - What do you think frog? - Rabbit black 21, rabbit black 21. After winning around 40,000 dollars, the man takes the frog up to his hotel room and sits it on the bed. - OK frog, you've done so much for me, is there anything I can do for you? - Rabbit kiss me, rabbit kiss me. So, the man leaned over and kissed the frog. It turned into a beautiful woman named Monica. - And that, your honor, is how she got into my room, or my name isn't William Jefferson Clinton! A guy was in a cave, looking for treasure. He found an old lamp, rubbed it, and a genie came out. The genie said: - I will grant you three wishes, but your ex-wife will get double. The man agreed, and said: - I wish I had a mansion. The genie granted it, and his ex-wife got two mansions. The man said: - I would like a million dollars. The genie again granted it and his ex-wife got two million dollars. Then the man said: - Scare me half to death. Two men were walking through the woods and came upon a big black, deep hole. One man picked up a rock and tossed it into the hole and stood listening for the rock to hit bottom. There was no sound. He turned to the other guy and said: - That must be a deep hole...let's throw a bigger rock in there and listen for it to hit bottom. The men found a bigger rock and both picked it up and lugged it to the hole and dropped it in. They listened for some time and never heard a sound. Again, they agreed that this must be one deep hole and maybe they should throw something even bigger into it. One man spotted a rail-road tie nearby. They picked up the tie, grunting and groaning, and lugged it to the hole. They tossed it in. No sound. All of a sudden, a goat came, flying out of the woods, running like the wind, and flew past the men and jumped straight into the hole. The men were amazed. About that time, an old hayseed farmer came out of the woods and asked the men if they had seen a goat. One man told the farmer of the incredible incident they had just witnessed...they had just seen this goat fly out of the woods and run and leap into the big hole. The man asked the farmer if this could have been his goat. The old farmer said: - No, that can't be my goat...he was chained to a railroad tie. "I see", - said the blind man. "I hear", - said the deaf man. And the man with no legs kicked them both | ||
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