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При закрытии подписчики были переданы в рассылку "Английский от Смирнова" на которую и рекомендуем вам подписаться.
Вы можете найти рассылки сходной тематики в Каталоге рассылок.
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Приношу извинения за перебои в выпусках рассылки. Подробнее о причинах можно прочитать на сайте - Catbegemot.net ---------------------------------------------- How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down. 2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice. 3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in" 5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has Gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso. 6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors". 7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy." 8. Dont use any punctuation marks 9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk. 10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer. 11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go". 12. Sing along at the opera. 13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme. 14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day. 15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood. 16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard Kim. 17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!" "3rd time this week!!!!!" 18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!!" 19. Tell your children over dinner. "due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go." And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity....... 20. Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you or asked you not to send them stuff like this. --------------------------------------------------------------- A good Irishman, John O'Reilly, met regularly with his toastmasters club. One evening they were hitting the Guinness Stout and having a contest as to who could make the best toast. John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here to spending the rest of me life, Between the legs of me wife!" That won him top prize for the best toast of the night. He went home and told his wife, Mary, he won the prize for the best toast of the night." She said, "Aye, and what was your toast?" John replied, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife!" Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said. The next day Mary ran into one of John's toasting buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "Did you know that John won the prize the other night with a toast about you, Mary?" She said, "Aye, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice! Once he fell asleep and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come!" ------------------------------------------------------------ It is good to be a woman: 1. We got off the Titanic first. 2. We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses. 3. Taxis stop for us. 4. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing. 5. No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo. 6. We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves. 7. If we forget to shave, no one has to know. 8. We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end. 9. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there. 10. We have the ability to dress ourselves. 11. We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked. 12. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot. 13. We will never regret piercing our ears. 14. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems. 15. We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway.
Если у вас возникли вопросы по поводу того, как переводится то или иное слово или понятия - обращайтесь к нам на форум сайта Кота Бегемота
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